Time heals.

02.14.07 - 11.30.09

When hurt turns red and a piece of your heart is missing. When the cold bites deep and you’ve got that feeling like you just got out of surgery. When the only way to stay sane is to concentrate on anything else but how you feel. When you count the tiles in the ceiling. When you push the earphones closer. When you remember every nuance of every word of every time. When all this happens. Embrace it. Feel every feeling. Cry every tear. Sob every sob. Because this is what it feels like to have loved.

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Monday, April 26th 2010 9:07am

Well, that kind of failed.

I called him at 2AM last night because I couldn’t sleep. I don’t know what to make of that conversation. It definitely didn’t go as well as a couple nights ago. I couldn’t sleep for another 3-4 hours after that. I just lied in bed with lots of thoughts running through my head.

Who are you, now?

You drink and smoke and go out all the time, which fine, I do occasionally, but the guy I knew and loved was willing to quit bad habits for me. The guy I knew and loved told me he was over the “drinking scene”. But of course I held you on a tight leash for three years and when I let go you went wild, right? Only makes sense. Whatever.