Time heals.

02.14.07 - 11.30.09

When hurt turns red and a piece of your heart is missing. When the cold bites deep and you’ve got that feeling like you just got out of surgery. When the only way to stay sane is to concentrate on anything else but how you feel. When you count the tiles in the ceiling. When you push the earphones closer. When you remember every nuance of every word of every time. When all this happens. Embrace it. Feel every feeling. Cry every tear. Sob every sob. Because this is what it feels like to have loved.

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Thursday, April 15th 2010 12:54pm

Email from you to me, June 20, 2009, when I was on vacation:

I can’t even remember a time when I’ve missed you as much as I miss you now. Last night at C’s house, me and F had a pretty crazy heart to heart conversation where we talked about our girlfriends and his incident that happened to him 3 years ago with the shooting, and everything in between. We have concluded that I love you more than he loves A, and he agrees. I told him everything he needed to know about our relationship and how it works and he was in awe… and I kind of like how that felt. We’re so perfect for each other baby. We go hand in hand, we’re one and the same, two peas in a pod, just meant for this kind of love. I just had to let you know. I love you sooooooooo much and I miss you beyond all words. Hope you’re having a blast, I can’t stress how much you deserve the break from your current life. LOVE YOU.

I really need to stop looking at old emails…