Time heals.

02.14.07 - 11.30.09

When hurt turns red and a piece of your heart is missing. When the cold bites deep and you’ve got that feeling like you just got out of surgery. When the only way to stay sane is to concentrate on anything else but how you feel. When you count the tiles in the ceiling. When you push the earphones closer. When you remember every nuance of every word of every time. When all this happens. Embrace it. Feel every feeling. Cry every tear. Sob every sob. Because this is what it feels like to have loved.

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Friday, March 26th 2010 9:19am

Stupid.

Just because you call one night, doesn’t mean you’ll keep calling me every night from now on. I was stupid to believe that you would. Stupid for glancing at my phone all night to see if you would call again. Ever since two nights ago, I’ve had you on my mind and I’ve had the urge to call or text you randomly. See what I mean? You walk into my life again and I don’t know how to handle it. This morning, I listened to songs that reminded me of you. I even changed your flash on my blackberry back to ‘disco’.

Ugh, this is all one vicious cycle. Either be in my life or don’t, goddamnit. I can’t be toyed like this.